"cause the enemy has been defeated, and death couldn't hold you down...
shout unto God with the voice of triumph
shout unto God with the voice of praise
shout unto God with the voice of triumph
we lift your name up, we lift your name up."
Bye bye April, hello month of may.
Well, in about five days anyway. :)
I cannot really say I'm quite excited for the coming days of may. I'm in a sad mood because we are not pushing through with our plans to go to Seattle anymore, to see my lovely aunt walk down the aisle on her special day ever. I won't be able to have a ultimate bond with my cousin too. I miss them all just too much. I guess it's not really in His time and plan. Originally, the decision was no. We weren't supposed to go in the first place. But then my ama goes and meets with father, father gets convinced, father says yes. Thus, makes all of us go jumping for joy. THEN BAAAAM, pooof poof poof, decision plan pops immediately when father and mother finds out through the agency they talked to that it's unpractical for us to go since my youngest twin brothers' passports are going to expire this year, this only meant that applying for an U.S. visa will be harder (WELL, that's what they said). All of our visas are expired and if we were to renew, they might give us only a month duration to stay there since they'll see two of our family members will get their passports expired by the month of December this year of 2010. SO MUCH FOR THE PLAN. :( BUT, dad said we might go December instead. After first all the passports are renewed then off to the application of the U.S. visas.
NEVERTHELESS, I have been really thinking a lot why. As, cliche as it sounds, everything has its own reasons. So, I've been doing a lot pondering lately on why exactly does He wants us to stay here for May. I mean, sure there's the preparation for my debut birthday. (WELL, that's another *cough cough* interesting story to tell. :S) But, aside from that (which i don't really care that much anyway because in the first place i really did not want to have one anyway) i couldn't still exactly decipher the big puzzle he laid out to me..i mean WHY. Until it finally dawned on me yesterday when we went out with my angkong and ama, my cousin surprised me by telling me that her mom-slash-my aunt already paid for an all expense retreat for my whole family. YUUUP, the whole 7 of us PLUS 1 (she even paid extra for our helper). My aunt knows how i love retreats. Well, go figure because i never attended a single one. Hence, which explains I want to go to a retreat that bad. I wasn't able to attend a single one because my parents simply just says no. I'm not exactly sure why, i feel like they don't trust me. They say all these reasons but it doesn't make that much sense to me. One mainly i don't get it since those retreats i wanted to go to before ARE camps from OUR CHURCH. And besides, I really really really want to be baptized already (I'm a protestant and mom said i was baptized under the catholic way but i was never one, i practiced protestantism ever since). And now yes, I'm very very exuberant about this and my heart is just about to do a 360 degrees flip UNTIL my mom told me she haven't told my dad anything about it yet. You see, my dad isn't really a fan of following schedules of other people (yes yes, especially this is a family retreat we are talking about). He doesn't want to live on others' time table or he'll feel like he'll be in jail or something. No, I'm not exaggerating I already heard that before. So on the flip side of my heart jumping for joy, I'm worried on how my dad's going to take the news of the whole retreat thing. I just wonder what reaction he'll show. And who's going to break the news for him? I DON'T KNOW. I just really hope he won't take it badly as he usually does before. I think THIS might just be the reason why He, my wonderful Father up there, wants my family to stay here. Oh, I'm sure I'll be there on that retreat (yes, with my mom and my four other siblings and oh yes with the helper too haha), but oh please I really pray that my dad would come too. Pastor Peter Tan-chi will be there to cover the event and do all his wonderful inspiring speeches, and hopefully the baptism part will be done too. It will be a life-changing moment. I know it. My other auntie and her family will be there too. My other cousin and his family will be there too. Our rooms I found out are probably near each other too. AND the retreat will be held on a beach!Oh, How wonderful. I love beaches. I wonder if there's a dawn watch or something. I'm already thinking of walking along the shoreline alone and share my footsteps with Him while in solitude prayer. :)
This is a good thing. WHO KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN.:)
It's an auspicious sign from Him.
MAYBE, just maybe this might just change EVERYTHING. :)
STILL, I hope my dad will be able to attend. (without fuss, without complains, and without his grumpy mood on, the only thing he'll be bringing is his faith and open heart.)
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currently 10:55 PM (a couple more minutes until my mom starts shouting at me for sleeping late. OH NO), I'm supposed to be reviewing integrated science and biology right now for college review stuff. OH SHOCKS. I should stop ranting and start reading.
